The Cycle Map™ · A free tool from The Attachment Laboratory™
See the cycle.
Find each other.
Two perspectives. One recurring dance. Explore what happens on the outside, what’s happening underneath, and where a new moment of connection can begin.
Free · No login · About 10 minutes each
Three stages, one shared pattern
Inspired by Emotionally Focused Therapy, the Cycle Map helps you step back and look at the pattern together. The cycle—not either partner—is what you’re examining.
Build your map
Each of you answers six gentle questions on your own—what set things off, what you felt underneath, what you feared, and what you longed for.
See the cycle
Put both halves side by side. Notice how what shows on the outside can hide what’s happening underneath—and how each response feeds the other.
Find a way back
Name how this dance usually ends, imagine a different moment, and practice putting the pattern into words together.
How it works
You each answer from your own experience, on your own device. Nobody sees a half-finished map, and no one is cast as the problem.
Start Your Map- 1
Enter both first names to start a private map. No account needed.
- 2
Fill out your half. Every question is optional and saves as you go.
- 3
Send your partner their own link so they can share their side independently.
- 4
Once you’re both done, explore the cycle and repair steps together.
This is a reflective tool, not therapy. If your situation involves safety concerns, please seek professional support.